I Hope I Die Before I Get Old
After a couple strokes my grandma moved into a nice (as nice as these things can be) assisted living facility. As we walked past the front desk the secretary was yelling at a resident, “Dang it Earl, PUT YOUR HEARING AIDS IN!” She turned to a nurse and said, “He is SO annoying.”
I made a mental note to keep that mean lady away from my grandma and headed on to her room.
“HEY! HOW TALL ARE YOU?” Earl had followed me.
“I'm six foot six.” “WHAT?” “I'm six foot six!”
“SIX?! YOU ARE WAY TALLER THAN SIX, I'M SIX FEET TALL!” “I am six FEET and six INCHES!” “NO, YOU ARE WAY TALLER THAN SIX FEET!”
Now holding up six fingers twice, and shouting louder than Earl, “I AM SIX FEET AND SIX INCHES TALL! SIX FOOT SIX!”
Earl shook his head, disgusted with my inability to gauge my own height and waved at me dismissively.
“You are way taller than that,” he mumbled as he shuffled away.
November 30th, 2004 - 21:42
Hilarious!
December 1st, 2004 - 10:54
The thought occurs to me that when I get old I think it would be fun to fake hearing loss.
The thought of driving others insane would be appealing. Especially if I have to go through life wearing Depend Undergarments. That humiliation alone would entitle me play mind games.
December 1st, 2004 - 22:00
This blog made me think of two things. In one of your earlier blogs you stated you were dizzy etc. If you are 6ft6in, does this occur when you stand from a sitting position? If so, it might be a vasovagal effect. Your height, flow of blood to the extremities not enough o2 in the blood becomes a partial syncopal episode, dizzyness, and light headed. Your height might be your problem. You just might have to alter your diet to increase RBC. secondly I do nuke med I see sick people all day. Personaly if I had and I do mean if I had to have an elderly disease it would be Alzhemiers, becuase everyday would be a new day. No more bad days.
December 1st, 2004 - 22:53
It is a good theory, the doc had the same one, but he eliminated it with several test, and the fact that the lightheadedness didn’t happen when I stood up.
Fortunately, it appears that my heart can handle my height.
December 3rd, 2004 - 10:10
hey-its meagan, jory’s friend (engagement photos?) i was wondering if you had his current address? thanks
December 3rd, 2004 - 23:46
I’M thinking of getting some of those (leg extentions) so I can be Six-Six
but I”ll have to get longer pants !
December 8th, 2004 - 23:14
I’m filing away that first paragraph as an exqample of catching the vernacular in a bottle. Good ear. I’ll remember that.