Papa November

thats one of the most incisive and profound movie reviews I have ever seen. It is realy a precis for a followup film. film makers take note.

I'm sorry, but I must protest: I feel that several of these characteristics could be of vital importance and of the utmost usefulness.

For instance, smelling like freshly-baked cookies: lull anyone into a zombie-like, carnal sense of complete sensory ecstasy and intense childlike security and bonhomie.

Never having to go to the bathroom: set World Landspeed Records for Trips From Utah To Disneyland For Vehicles Featuring At Least One Adult and Multiple Children Of Potty-Training Age.

Communicating With Snails: Control the global economy by summoning absolute and decimating snail-plagues that strategically destroy major crops worldwide. (Must be a sociopath who is able to ignore the mass starvation which results; but is otherwise fab.)

And don't even get me started with the rainbows...

I see your point, if your mutation is worthless it means you have no imagination. Except for the really long toenails, whatever clever way you might find to use them, it is offset by the fact that you can't wear shoes. And you have gross really long toenails.

I'd *love* the ability to move paper with my mind. Think of the fights in office buildings! I could stand of a piece of levatating cardboard (with my eyes closed and arms outstreched for effect), as stacks of documents from nearby desks swirl into a papery vortex around me.
Then you dump it all on the bad guys.

And fyi, cocker spaniels are pretty darn fast.

There is a new kids movie coming out. I think it is called Zoom. The whole thing is about a search for superheroes. People are walking around with all sorts of powers and the government(or someone) hold auditions to find the best team. One boy has the abilithy to expand to huge proportions, one can go invisible etc. The rejects are along the lines of your list and worse.

I hadn't thought of the deadly papercuts you could inflict with that power. Ok, I need suggestions for truely useless mutations.

I took my kids swimming with their cousins [grettir's girls] the other day. They were playing a version of "Totally Spies" cross-bred with Wonder Woman, and were trying to decide which secret power they'd each have. One had "freeze-breath." Another chose animal mind-control. The others were debating; so to throw in my $.02 and prove that theory wrong I piped up, "Hey! What about rainbows that shoot out of your eyes!"

[*Long, awkward silence, all eyes staring blankly at you.*]

"And knock people out?"

This was followed by another longer, even more awkward and inherently embarrassing "Dumb!" silence. The kind where you can actually hear the crickets chirping in the background.

So you're right. The rainbows are worthless. Even highly imaginitive early test audiences gave it an unequivocal failing grade.

I appreciate your research and also am grateful I didn't run it by a large group. Unless of course you consider the entire internet a large group.

The abililty to wake up without an alarm clock.

My friends and I use to talk about mutant powers that were ok to have but couldn't get you into the X-Men. Mine was Thermos Boy. His bare hands can keep cold drinks cold, and hot drinks hot, for up to 30 minutes!