I was in Houston this week. After checking 26 hotels without finding a room I ended up staying at the home of one of my customers; very nice of him. The hotels are packed with families who haven’t been able to go back to their homes and insurance adjusters and others in town to work on roofs, powerlines, roads, etc. It is pretty much business as usual there, other than all of the blue tarps on roofs and the occasional boarded up window you wouldn’t guess what had just happened.

When I went to visit one of my customers, I opened the office door and started to step in before I noticed the place was destroyed (see picture above). It looked perfect from the outside, you couldn’t see a hint of damage. I found them working out of a motor home on the side of the building with phones lines running across the parking lot to them from the ruined building. Another office I visited was stripped to the studs in a lot of places but humming along as if nothing had happened.

For some reason I just couldn’t sleep on this trip. It took me forever to fall asleep and then I woke up every hour and ended up giving up and just reading until it was time to get dressed. This started to take a toll on me after a few days and my coworker pointed out that it was evident in my driving. I started off laughing when people cut me off or didn’t let me over and I let anyone in that put their signal on. By the end of the trip I couldn’t stop talking about how much I hated Texas drivers (it also became clear that I say that about every state I go to. Looks like I just hate drivers) and preemptively called them names for what I was sure they were about to do. I also began to argue with the GPS unit. She was a liar and maybe a little vindictive; “turn right” she would say and when I turned right she would tell me “recalculating route”. My coworker claimed she had in fact said “turn left”, but he had named her Gladys and was a little too close to her to be objective. He also was probably paying me back for taking him to the taco shop with so many bars on the windows that it was shady inside. Finally we switched it to Spanish and the extra effort it took to understand kept me paying attention and on track.

We made it to the airport (after about 4 wrong turns and a brief argument with a toll booth operator) and I calmed down enough to make it through security. I almost had to slap the man in front of me though. He kept telling me, “can you believe they took my iced tea away? Four bottles! I can’t believe they took them. Who knew you couldn’t bring iced tea? Not water, it was iced tea!” Iced tea isn’t a liquid in Texas, it is a right. I managed to show some sympathy by making a really sad face and saying, “wahhhh”, but he was too busy lamenting his lost tea to notice my concern.

I was in such a fog by the time the plane landed in Seattle that I have no idea if I slept or not. I remember at one point the couple next to me having an argument about whether he had in fact said that his friend’s wife was hotter than his wife or if he had just said “she was really tall and thin and pretty”. After a few minutes he saw that he was losing and began to argue that it wasn’t his fault that his friend’s wife was hot and besides he never said she was and also “you weren’t even there when I said it”. He’s ready for the presidential debates.

I was worried that lack of sleep would give me migraines like it sometimes does, but it just turned me into a grumpy old man. Next time I am on the road I am taking sleeping pills and a cane to shake at all the idiot drivers.

She pushed this at least half a mile.

Hmmm…….I haven’t seen the research on that, so I will have to take your word for it. I have heard that shooting yourself in the head is dangerous though. I might make a sticker of that. Or maybe, “Being happy makes you feel good!”

Yesterday I walked into Old School Pizza and that same man was in line ahead of me. He has about 3 cat carriers strapped to his bike and he turned and asked me if I thought his cats were OK out there or if it was too hot. I said that it was probably OK, but he could move them into the shade if he was worried. Apparently that was the wrong thing to say. He got a very angry look on his face and said, “I know 5 forms of martial arts.” At this point I am thinking- ha, the “artial marts” thing again, but then he finished with, “And I am about to use one of them on you!” He then rolled up his sleeves and took a step towards me. I really didn’t want to get in a fist fight (or Judo I would guess) with a rail thin mentally ill man in my favorite pizza place, so I said, “ok, but how about you do it later because it is your turn to order.” He turned around and looked at the counter then asked me in a suspicious tone, “How long have you lived here, because this sort of heroin can’t be found in this area” and before I could answer he walked out the door.

*I should add that my office overlooks the street corner he usually stands on and as I wrote this I could see him asking everyone walking by if they could “spare some weed”.

Here are Grant and Evelyn enjoying hanging out at 7-11 in Vancouver at 10pm.

Before I left Tulsa for the drive to Oklahoma City, a customer told me about his friend who had been caught in a tornado on that road and had his legs broken when it repeatedly bashed him into a freeway underpass. His truck came out of it the size and shape of a fridge. I kept my eye out for any shelter or extra deep ditch I could hide in if I saw a twister.

The tornado siren went off just as I was driving through the downtown. The driver in front of me jumped out of his car and ran into a building and the rain was whipping down the street like a wind-tunnel. The siren turned off before I could decide where to run. I pulled into my hotel on 20th and Meridian just as the announcer on the radio said the small tornado had touched down on 63rd and Meridian.

Grant and I went for a little adventure under the 4th ave bridge and walked on the abandoned railroad track. It was too nice out to be inside or follow no trespassing warnings.

I was in Boise, Tulsa and Oklahoma City this week. I found out that Oklahoma hates me. I can’t tell you how many times I started through an intersection after the light turned green and had to slap on the brakes to keep from getting hit by someone running the light. It got to the point where I would just wait 8 minutes after the light turned to make sure everyone was done.

Josh and I spotted this moon jellyfish down at Percival Landing the other day. From what I understand the sting is very mild and you may not even notice it. I tried to convince Josh to pick it up and check, but he wasn’t that curious.

We went to Orange County last weekend for Michelle’s cousins wedding, and despite Evelyn’s reaction above we had a great time. We got to meet all of Michelle’s aunts and uncles and cousins and second cousins and their friends. We ate dinner at 10pm and Michelle and I butchered the Spanish we have left with the encouragement and to the amusement of the Ecuadorians and Puerto Ricans. It was a great party.

Grant woke us up this morning yelling that it was snowing. We got dressed and after he made several snow angels we made this tiny little snowman. Evie didn’t help, she just wanted to be in the picture.

I was out of town for four days and came home to this; 4 inches of maple leaves. I couldn’t even tell where my driveway was, the entire property was buried. Notice my neighbors leaf free lawn in the background.

Hey, I have an idea, why don’t you go here and buy lots of stuff! Michelle and her friend have started and Etsy shop. They sell really cool baby gear, so go check it out!